It’s our last night in Bangkok before heading south towards the beaches and, hopefully, climbing around Krabi first thing tomorrow morning. Still Very Hot and Very Humid.

The inaugural This Week’s Top Three:

1. Holy turtle gets it. Whilst walking along the moat of the King’s residence we noticed lots of cute turtles in the water (and lonely wellies left scattered on the banks). The turtles are released by Buddhists in order to make merit on the path to Enlightenment. The next thing we saw was the most un-Buddhist monitor lizard ever to reach a meter and a half in length, beating one of the turtles against the palace wall before swallowing it WHOLE. Wellies explained.

2. Massage at the temple. The 16th century Wat Pho is the oldest and largest Buddhist temple in Bangkok, has lots glittery buildings, a 45m long Reclining Buddha entirely covered in gold leaf, a basketball court and a Thai massage school. Shoulders still ache.

3. Chao Phraya river. The river that is the colour of chocolate, full of flip-flops, coconut shells, shredded palm leaves, long-tailed boats (think James Bond) and seething with catfish.